I was chatting with a dear friend of mine this morning on the way to work. This friend is in a very similar "life place". Married, multiple children around the same age as my "Things" are. The discussion this morning was on child rearing. More specifically, child rearing the oldest boy of the brood, and dealing with said child's attitude. We both have the same hope...please let this be over before he is a teenager or one of us will not make it.
In our conversation during, and texting after we have decided that it takes having good friends and lots of wine. The wine is for obvious reasons, the friends are to remind you that you are not the craptastic parent that you think you are.
Not only does it take a village to raise the child, it takes a village to get the parents through raising a child. I need my husband and of course our moms in the figuring this parenting thing out, but I really don't know that my kids could manage if I didn't have my little group of moms to talk to. I think it important to have a certain dynamic to your group.
In your corner you need 1) the mom who has only kids of the opposite gender, this is to remind you that your gender children aren't nearly as confusing as you think they are. For me it is a mom of only girls, since the "Things" are obviously boys. 2) the mom who has older kids, they can give you an idea of what may possibly be ahead. 3) the mom who has kids the same age as yours, that way you will know your not alone and your kid really is normal. 4) the mom who has kids younger than you, so you can offer pearls of wisdom and scare the crap out of her with stories of what your kids have done. 5) the mom with more children than you, this is to remind you that in the us-vs-them battle it pays not to be out numbered.
You will find in the long run that while the parents make the child, the mom births the child, the village really does raise the child. No matter if the village is all in the same town or if the village is several states away.
